Hopeless

It wasn’t how I planned it
no this can not be me.
Staring in the mirror
I’m running out of dreams.
The future feels so hopeless
it hurts to take a breath
halfway living
inside I’m scared to death.
I want more than just surviving
I want to really live
I’ve tried everything
I have nothing more to give
Not so long ago
before it fell apart
I dreamed the impossible
I broke my own heart
So I learned a lesson
I hope but I don’t wait
and when I start to dream
I dream but stay awake.
The walls are built around me
I’m reminded of who I am
I’m holding back the tears
my fingers in the dam.
I keep it all inside
but it’s fighting to be free
and when it falls to pieces
there will be nothing left of me.